You are currently browsing the monthly archive for April 2007.

Quick link to a sweet peice of beatbox action from what I assume is France’s version of Pop Idol.  He’s a big maori-looking dude (speaking of maori, I’m sure I’ll get to the trip to New Zealand with Chad in a post sooner or later) who asks if he can beatbox before he does his song.  My French is a bit rusty, but after hearing his beatbox work, the judges appear to tell him not to bother with the song and send him through to the next round based purely on his mad beats.

[Note: Viper Pilot is now back in Canada, for a limited engagement!  If you’re looking to get in touch with me, drop a comment or head over to the Landing Deck and scroll to the bottom for my email address.]


I can speak on a subject like this thanks to the misspent years (and dollars) of my youth. A youth where CDs with titles like Club Hitz 1997 and Euro Dance Volume 5 lined my CD rack. Thankfully, I am capable of learning from my mistakes.

There is, of course, an unspoken rule, which I will repeat now to get it out of the way. For those of you not aware, the unspoken rule is simply to avoid anything calling itself ‘dance’ music. However, the big labels have catched on, and now there’s no guarantee that all crap electronic music ends up with a dance music tag to warn us. Those ‘Parental Advisory’ stickers on CDs? The record companies should be required by law to state that a CD contains ‘Dance Music’ in the same fashion.

So, what’s this secret you have for us, Viper Pilot? This particular tip involves the artist names in the tracklisting. There’s a very simple formula you can apply to work out what kind of goods you’re about to receive.

<track name> – X (featuring Y)


X = an artist you’ve never heard of before


Y = a female name

Some (fictional) examples:

Summer’s End – Beat Kings feat. Danice

Paralized – Nice feat. Shawna Unwood

Etc, etc.

Now, why does this work, and how? You can guaran-damn-tee that a song by an outfit you don’t know, featuring a female guest artist is going to be some awful generic audio pablum fitting into one of two camps: Shitty commercial house with a fat black woman wailing in a Pop Idol fourteen-notes-per-vowel manner, or vomitous vocal trance with a rail-thin white woman singing about love being like the wings of an angel.

(Please don’t take the above to mean that I’m saying there’s good commercial house or vocal trance to be found, just that this is one way in which you can detect it without any aural pain.)

Armed with this knowledge, you can find out quickly if that CD in your hands is full of big label garbage or not. If a compilation has one of the above on it, odds are there’ll be a few more.

Now, go forth and shop.

Ninja Tune‘s weekly radio show, Solid Steel, is an absolute corker this week. While the selection of songs and the mixing is usually top-notch over there on any given week, this episode has some real gems buried in it. Granted, I can guarantee that not every song is going to be to everyone’s liking (myself included), but there isn’t a single track that sounds stale – everything is either scorchingly new or brilliance from the past.

Find out why the we’ve been using Solid Steel for most of our armouring needs in the Viper Pilot fleet for years now.

PS. Big shout-out to Mike for wearing a Viper Pilot shirt to drinks on Saturday.  Consider yourself promoted to active flight duty, son.

No description required here – it’s Bill Cosby and Dr. Dre.

As an aside, Mrs. Viper Pilot told me yesterday: “I always stab people in my dreams”, so if I turn up dead in a ditch with some knife wounds…

Yet another successful sortie for the Viper Pilot. Some supreme cratedigging (thanks go to Chad for supplying the crates I was digging through) scored me a Moog novelty song from the late 60s for this mash. I saw the Pixies live at the V Festival last weekend, so they were in my head and have ended up in here, along with an old favourite dance track (big thanks to DJ Prince for his MAARS sample pack).

Viper Pilot – U-Moog on Maars

Source material:
The Pixies – U-Mass
MAARS – Pump up the Volume
Dick Hyman – Me and My Moog

Just in case some of you still haven’t got your head around the concept of mashups, I think I’ll let 80-something-old Sue Teller explain. Heck, even if you *do* know what it’s all about, you should still watch this video.

Do not mess with Canada.  Ever.

Some of you have heard my first bootleg. Just in case you’ve managed to wander here without having heard it yet, I thought I’d best share a link to it so you can see what all the fuss was about. Maybe you’ll be able to feel like you were a part of it when it all started, like when old people talk about the moon landing.

Viper Pilot – Do the Busta Stop (Busta Rhymes vs Fatback Band vs Daft Punk)

You know, I don’t think I’ve ever had someone talk to me about what it was like when Apollo 11 touched down. I’m pretty torn about that, so feel free to come up to me on the street and tell me all about it.

Attention! Officer on the deck!

At ease, pilots. And so begins my blog. What to expect here? I’ll be mixing up some wicked beats, the odd personal note, and I will be the rally point for the fourth air wing of the fifth battlecruiser fleet. We will be launching a sonic assault at oh-four-hundred. Commit those instructions to memory.

Lastly, folks, remember that I am the wingman you want when you need to shake your tail.

-Viper Pilot

Viper Pilot Audio

Looking for music by Viper Pilot? This blog is the current home of Viper Pilot's Munition Works, where he stores all of his mashes and mixes.

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